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Just like
the previous two movies, Creepshow 3 is a
horror anthology. But while the first two movies only
had three stories, Creepshow 3 has a total of five
horror stories. But are they any good? Well you're
about to find out.
Taurus Entertainment is slowly becoming infamous for
making low-budget sequels to horror classics. The last
one we saw from them was "Day Of The Dead: Contagium",
which I thought was mildly entertaining, but was
widely hated among horror fans. So is Creepshow 3
any better? Well, to be honest with you, it was a
mixed bag, but why it's called Creepshow 3 is beyond
me. The movie starts out with some really crappy
cartoon (nothing like the first two) introducing the
first story. Luckily this cheap homemade cartoon thing
didn't come back further into the movie. But then,
what does it have in common with the first two movies?
Well two things; it's a horror anthology and each
segment ends with a freeze frame in toon-style. Enough
in common to call it a sequel? I think not.
As you might have all ready figured out, I will be
reviewing each segment individually as I think that's
the right thing to do with anthologies. Just because
one story sucks doesn't mean that they all do. However,
the first story really did turn me off as it was
beyond atrocious.
The first story opens up with a whiny teenage girl,
Alice, complaining about everything. Her father has
just received a universal remote control from their
scientist neighbour and is eager to try it out.
Unfortunately, every time he pushes a button, Alice's
family changes into a different family. Oh and for
some reason, Alice is starting to melt. This doesn't
seem to bother her much though so she breaks into her
neighbours house and starts chugging down a wedding
cake with some champagne. The point of the story?
I don't know. This segment was absolutely horrendous
to sit through. The acting is tragic and the story
is just too ridiculous. I was now positive that I was
in for some really atrocious short stories.
However, the second story proved me wrong. This story
is about Jerry, a shy guy who lives in a whorehouse
for whatever reason. He buys a radio from a hobo
which turns out to be inhabited by the spirit of a
woman (err, or something like that). The female voice
tells him that as long as she does what he says, he
will become successful and rich. Naturally, these
things have a price though. There's nothing really
new to be found here, it's a simple story but it's
actually rather entertaining. You ask yourself whether
the radio is actually talking to him or if it's just
his imagination and for once, you actually get an
answer in the end. This story was in true Creepshow
style and I really enjoyed it, could the next segment
be as entertaining as this?
Yes, actually. To my surprise I found the third story
to be just as good (mind you, when I say good, I mean
decent/watchable, not great). This one is about a
call girl who's also a dangerous serial killer, but
her latest victim won't give up without a fight. Just
like the second segment, this doesn't really head into
new territory, but what I liked about this one was that
it genuinely felt like a classic 80s horror flick. It
was very well executed and pretty damn entertaining.
Unfortunately, this is where the good stuff ended.
Perhaps they should have kept it at three stories
because the fourth one goes back to the scientist
neighbour from the first segment, which was obviously
the worst. He's about to get married and has invited
two of his old students to meet his girlfriend while
he runs out to buy a wedding cake. His girlfriend
seems nice, but the students think that she seems
almost too perfect so they figure that their old
teacher must have built a robot girlfriend. Now this
was just plain silly. I'm not going to get into details
here but the twist is just so obvious and stupid that
it's not even funny.
I've now reached the fifth and final segment and by
now I've realized that they're somehow trying to
connect all the segments to each other. It doesn't
really work though as they've rushed it, which makes
it both confusing and sometimes inaccurate. Either
way, the fifth story is about a party-wild doctor
who is painfully honest to his patients. One thing
leads to another and he ends up getting haunted by
a hobo with a hot dog. I can't even be bothered
explaining more because it's just so silly, this
story was just pathetic.
Ultimately, Creepshow 3 sported two decent stories
but three poor to atrocious ones and that's sadly not
enough for me to be able to recommend this DTV sequel.
It feels as if anyone could have made these stories
up really and even the good ones were lacking imagination.
There's no point in checking this one out people,
stick to the first two movies instead.
Some severed body parts and some blood splatter, gory
enough for most people.
The entire score sounded like a school orchestra warming
up. It was just beyond ridiculous. Incompetently made
and utterly cheesy. Yuck!
Creepshow 3 left me with a bad taste in my mouth. It
doesn't have anything to do with the other Creepshow
movies and the entire thing feels like a rush job
without much effort put into it. Two decent stories
can be found in here but the other three were just
terrible. Don't waste your time.
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