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Good
Night, God Bless |
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Someone dressed as a priest walks into a London schoolyard,
stabs the teacher, and proceeds to shoot all of the children.
A little girl named Mandy is the sole survivor of the massacre
and has very little recollection of the killer. Enter
American detective, Joe Yanovich. Much to the chagrin of his
Brit colleagues, he’s given the case and becomes close
(professionally and personally) with Mandy and her mother.
Even though he’s a good detective, Joe can’t seem to find one
good lead on the murders and investigates at the local parishes.
Meanwhile, the killer goes on a rampage, claiming the lives of
various women in the city…and Mandy and her mother may be next.
The schoolyard massacre that kicks off “Good Night, God Bless”
is probably one for the books. The murder of innocent children
is disturbing in and of itself, but when it’s done at the hands
of a priest, who lovingly strokes his rosary beads before
unleashing the unspeakable….
It’s just too bad that the movie never tops (or equals) that
opening moment. It almost seems as if the creators behind “Good
Night, God Bless” conceived that one scene during a creative
brainstorm and then felt inconvenienced by the fact that they
had to come up with a script that would hash out into a
ninety-plus minute film. For the most part, this one plays more
like a dull cop-drama and the slasher aspect of the film seems
like it was created purposely to market it as a horror film (for
further reference, just check the box-art, which leads
prospective renters into believing that they might be getting
some sort of gory demonic possession film with religious affiliation)
Most of the thrills after the opening scene are pretty much
old-hat. We get the old reliable stalking of a dizzy co-ed after
a night out at the disco...a scene where Mandy’s mother is stalked
through a dark house after experiencing one of those “When a
Stranger Calls” moments…and even a scene where a woman is chased
through the forest. As welcoming as these tidbits may be, “Good
Night, God Bless” manages to make this familiar territory seem
inordinately stale. For one thing, it feels as if director John
Eyres included everything that wasn’t completely unusable in the
film…very tight in the places that shouldn’t have been and a bit
too dwelling on mundane stuff that didn’t really have anything to
do with the story. It almost seems like the editor was narcoleptic.
And there’s at least 3, count em, THREE musical montages!
The acting here was pretty middle-of-road…not good enough to get
you invested in the characters nor bad enough to be of any camp value.
In fact, the movie is played straight-faced most of the time (save
for a scene in which Yanovich pantses two thugs who attack him in
a public toilet). What bugged me about the whole thing were the
seemingly endless scenes of characters reflecting and the false
intensity that it tries to build…I almost wanted to scream “Would
you hurry the fuck up?!”. I desperately wanted to know what conclusion
such a meandering film would come to and how the supernatural aspect
of the story, so eloquently illustrated on the cover art, would play
into this movie. The ending, probably the only other scene besides
the beginning that struck a chord with me, comes so abruptly and out
of nowhere that you’re sort of left on your ass, scratching your head,
and wondering just what the hell you spent your time on.
Pretty sparse and none too graphic…most of the murders are either
off screen or not shown at all. A few stabbings (one from the backseat
of a car), a dog is found murdered, a man is impaled with a spiked
grating, and a couple of people are found mutilated.
There is an eerie opening theme with a child singing. There’s a
Duran Duran-esque song in a disco and an excruciating love ballad
plays during the courtship montage between Yanovich and Mandy’s mom.
The rest of the musical score is mainly spooky, yet cheap,
synthesizer junk that apes “The Omen” or “The Exorcist”.
Since this is the first review I’ve done in awhile, I really
wanted to give “Good Night, God Bless” a fair shot. Technically,
it does have a few things going for it, but the sum of its parts
add up to a big bore. It’s a sub-par, wannabe-whodunit with a tacked
on ending that seems like the only other good idea that the creators
came up with during that creative brainstorm.
Review By: The ScareMaker
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