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Hillside Cannibals |
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Five
teenagers head out to the Californian hills
for some pot-smoking and sexual relief. What they
don't know is that a tribe of cannibalistic
people are inhabiting the hills and it doesn't
take long before three of the teenagers are killed
off. Now it's up to the two remaining teenagers
to get out of this situation.
Hillside Cannibals is yet another cheap cash-in
from The Asylum. Obviously, the movie that they're
trying to copy here is "The Hills Have Eyes" but
they've done a terrible job at that. I don't
really understand why they didn't just make a sequel
to their brilliant film "Detour" aka "Hell's Highway"
as that was also a lot like "The Hills Have Eyes".
Instead we got this cheap horror flick which has
absolutely nothing going for it.
The plot has surprisingly little in common with
the plot in "The Hills Have Eyes". Five teens
go out to the Californian hills to do some
pot-smoking but run into a bunch of deranged
cannibals. But that's where the connection between
the two movies end. Three of the teens are killed
off within the first 20 minutes and for the
remaining hour we get to follow the two survivors
as they try to get out alive. It's a very
repetetive story and nothing really happens for
most of the time. We get to hear the cannibals
speak some made-up language for about a total of
20 minutes which really felt unnecessary and
dull. There is therefore minor real dialogue in
the movie and I can't imagine that this script
took many hours to write.
As if I wasn't fed up enough with all these damn
remakes, I actually have to sit and watch a remake
of a remake. I could ramble on and on about how
disappointed I am with The Asylum but I'm not
going to as you probably all know what my
feelings towards their cheap remakes of remakes
are by now. Don't waste your time on this film,
go rent the original "The Hills Have Eyes" instead,
or even the remake (which I thought was slightly
better than the original).
We get a slit throat, a girl chopped in half,
a dismembered head, an axe in ones head, a finger
snipped off and some more.
The repetitive bongo-drums got dull after a while
and it didn't feel like anyone put any real
effort into making this score. Pretty bad.
Hillside Cannibals is pure crap, to put it nicely.
It's incredibly slow-paced, it has close to no
dialogue in it at all and it feels like anyone
could have written the script for this movie
better. Don't bother with this one as it's not
nearly as good as the movies that it's ripping off.
Review By: AnthroFred
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