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Nail Gun Massacre |
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A gang of handymen rape a woman. A year later or
so a mysterious killer in a motorcycle helmet
begins eliminating the handymen one by one with
a nail-gun.
Again I wonder... what were they thinking? Why
make this sort of brain-dead sleaze film without
any sense of humour and starting off with such
a serious subject as rape. After the opening
rape (making this feel like a Last House on the
Left/I Spit on Your Grave rip-off) we get the
usual by-the-numbers killings, with no real
characters whatsoever. Just handymen getting
killed with a nail-gun. The imagination blossoms...
The killer is right down ludicrous. Not matching
his lame weapon, he wears a black motorcycle
helmet and a camouflage outfit! To boot, he's
badly dubbed and has a hilariously bad, overused
"evil laugh" which even gets to score the
pre-credits! There's the POV camerawork ripped
off from "Halloween" and the awful one-liners
for each victim. This guy could be unintentionally
funny but is just sad and pathetic. And oh,
of course he's not the least scary.
So murder after another, with no thinkable hero
or heroine in sight. The only characters are the
handymen and their girlfriends (so we can get
some cheesy, soft-porn-like gratuitous nudity)
and they all die pretty quickly (with exception
for some really long, completely out-of-place
subplots), which is pretty much what they
deserve considering their crime. To make things
worse (but the budget cheaper I guess) is that
most murders take place during daytime so any
chance of suspense flies out the window.
There are some unintentional laughs though,
thankfully. The piano-clink score is overused
outrageously, like in a dialogue between two
cops: "It must have been a slow death" PIANO
CLINK, ""I'd say probably because of the loss
of blood" PIANO CLINK! The whole combination of
thick Texas accents, amateurish camerawork and
stuff acting makes it a occasional laugh riot.
Favourite scene has the killer hiding in
a pool (!), shooting a victim who falls over a
barbeque and into a fence, and then (when
supposed to be dead, I guess) pushing himself
away from the fence.
Otherwise, this is a pointless, long, dull,
amateurish thrash with a few unintentional
laughs to keep it from being a total sleeping
pill. But it's nowhere near to make it even
slightly watchable.
People get shot with a nail-gun. Some gore,
but no good.
Really bad 80s techno, and not to forget - the
dramatic piano clink score.
Completely brain-dead thrash with no real characters,
just a ludicrous, badly dubbed killer in a
motorcycle helmet and rapist-handymen with naked
girlfriends getting shot with a nail-gun.
Unwatchable with exception for a few
unintentional laughs.
Review By: Slicer-Dicer
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